rant · Teddy · Tuesday · Uncategorized

Tuesday, Teddy and the house monster…

Hi Peoples, Teddy here.


Let me tell you I have had the scare of my life!  I thought going back to The Shelter for sharp sticks was scary but there is something even worse.  And it lives in my condo!

It is a house monster!  It is so loud you can’t hear the phone ring or a people knocking at the door.  Mama says most people have one  at their house.  It is a necessity if you have rugs, she says.


Oh, I know it looks innocent enough.  Like it would just roll on its wheelie feet and lap up the stuff on the rug.  Mama doesn’t like stuff that gets on the rug.  I don’t know why there is some pretty tasty stuff to be found.  Once I found a potato chip!  It was good.

Mama wants to take out the part about finding the tasty stuff like the potato chip.  She says it makes it seem like she is a slob.  She’s not just a little messy.   I help her by eating the tasty stuff.  And I am much quieter than the house monster.  Anyway this is my post she is just typing because I don’t know how and the agreement is I tell her what I want to say and she types it–no editing–so it stays.

Oh yeah, about the house monster, it’s called a vacuum cleaner, Dirt Devil is its name.  Got that right it is a dirty devil!  I want it gone!  But it is going to stay.  You better believe when I see it come out of the closet I am so under the bed!



16 thoughts on “Tuesday, Teddy and the house monster…

  1. Hi Teddy,

    We have carpets, but I never see my human with a house monster. Thanks for letting me know what to do if I ever see her with one of those things!

    Your dog friend,

    1. You are so lucky Louis…house monsters are awful! If your people gets one you will be so scared your tail won’t wag for a week.

  2. Hi Teddy, Mollie here. We have one of those that they call a central vac. No body, just a big old arm that comes to get ya! Jake, Hazel and me go under the big bed until it goes to sleep. It doesn’t come out too much. I am very interested in those potato chips. I will have to look for them. Usually Jake sucks up all the good stuff.

    1. Potato chips are awesome salty things–I love them! They are crispy and sometimes bits break off when people bite them and if you are quick you can get some before they pick up the little pieces. Good luck Mollie.

  3. I bark at that thing when it comes out at our house. How dare it pick up all the tasty morsels in the carpet. I think I do a good enough job cleaning the floors.

  4. Dear Teddy,

    I hear your pain! My Mom says you look just like me when I was a baby. I am now a mature 15 year old who still has plenty of spunk. I like potato chips too! My Mom said she never heard of a cat eating potato chips!! Keep up the good work on cleaning up the tasty morsels… and rest comfortably under the bed when she gets the dirty devil out. That’s what I do. Mom says some things that smell like a tasty morsel are not good for kitties. Mom says it’s called “compromise.”

    Miss Monhegan Mist (aka Miss Misty)

    1. Hi Miss Misty, You must be a beautiful cat. Mama says there aren’t many solid gray kitties around so we are special. Mama’s old girl catkid, Dolly, liked potato chips so much she would put her nose right up to Mama’s face to get some. thanks for coming by!

  5. Teddy, you are the cutest vacuum sweeper ever. 🙂 Momma’s right though . .. us 2 leggeds have to use them. There’s other stuff down there that our sweet pets won’t eat.

      1. I think it’s just a myth about up peoples being smart. 🙂 My girl and her kitty both hide on the bed with pillows and covers when our noisy devil runs.

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