Using the prompt for
In Other Words
“Men are a luxury, not a necessity.”
I wonder if Cher always felt this way or did it come with age and maturity? I remember being oh so young and needing a man to feel, I was going to say whole or complete, but the truth is I needed a man to feel I had any worth, any value.
I was so insecure and unsure within myself that I thought a boyfriend was what proved my worth, what made me beautiful and interesting. A man was what made me better than who I was, or so I thought. Sad, huh? Makes me angry to think about that young woman who was so miserable because of her confusion and foolishness. That young woman made a lot of silly, and some not so silly mistakes!
Now I am oh so much older and know that I do have worth and beauty and I am interesting. Though still often confused and sometimes foolish I am who I am and ok with it. Would I like to be crazy in love again? You bet! Is it necessary to be happy and fulfilled? Nope! Would I consider a man in my life a luxury? No, but it would be a sweet gift this time around.
9 thoughts on “Luxury or necessity…”
Excellent post. All of the women in my life always “had to have a man”. They all followed this warped thinking. And consequently, they all had many failed relationships. I knew at an early age that this was not something I wanted to do. Thankfully, I was blessed with Bill. We have been married 35 years, and were friends for four years before that. But, I know who I am, and he respects that, even loves that about me.
I have never married and have a good life so know that the mindset of needing a man is a false thought. Most importantly we must, as you say, know who we are. We must be complete in ourselves before we can be a complement to someone else.
I love the wisdom of your perspective from advantage of years. You are absolutely right, we are complete and having a significant other person in our lives is not a necessity. Anyone can be completely happy and fulfilled on their own, though the right partner can also be a real blessing if God sends one. I love that you are content with your life yet remain open to possibilities. I know that I would be ok on my own too, I’ve done it before. We never know what Jesus has in store for us, but we do know we will never be alone because we have Him.
Sadly, this is not something most people understand. There are those who feel sorry for me because I never married and do not have a special man in my life now and wonder how I can be happy. I am happy and don’t think a man would make me happier but maybe a different happy, if that makes sense.
Exactly right, Patricia. I hope today’s girls are taught this very lesson. ❤
I hope so, too, but not sure they are being taught any differently than the generations before them. Rarely, do we hear of happy single women and if we do there is always a feeling that comes across that they are not quite whole.
I love your attitude. Realistic and straight forward. It seems love comes when you least expect it. You just never know.
Thanks. I certainly don’t expect love to come into my life now and that is okay. If it did I might die from the surprise. 🙂
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