Kindness Challenge Week 3
I am pretty accepting of who I am in many ways; I dress the way I want whether it is considered fashionable or not and my hair is usually a mess but as long as it is clean I don’t care, I have gained weight and am no longer a skinny-mini and I am fine with it though I am being careful not to gain more pounds. I am a woman of faith but no longer go to church and many of my friends don’t understand and that’s ok with me, they don’t have to understand or like my choice. I am quiet and spend a lot of time alone with occasional visits with friends and that is a good balance for me. So, there is self-acceptance in my life.
However, while thinking about Niki’s challenge this week I learned that though I do like myself and where I am in life but there is a place in my being that I am just learning to accept.
It is a chronic physical issue. Nothing that will kill me, just makes life difficult sometimes. Really, it is nothing when compared to people with major diseases and disabilities. But it is a part of myself that is not easy to accept. I hate it! When it rears its ugly head I tend to judge myself harshly, thinking I should be able to get over this problem and not be so weak. I should be able to carry on as usual and go about my day without interruption. But the fact is, I cannot get over this and when it flares I cannot carry on as usual without interruption to my day, I can only accept it for what it is, part of me. Sometimes, self-acceptance takes a lot of work! But I have found that with self-acceptance comes the gift of loving others as they are without conditions or expectations and that makes the work worth the effort.
12 thoughts on “Self-Acceptance, reflection…”
I really feel your journey, Patricia. We live in a physical form that can abandon us sometimes and make living in our body difficult. No one really knows what we are going through. It’s a journey we have to deal with ourselves, yet we can reach out to others to assist to make the journey easier. I’ve had a few episodes in life where I was in so much pain that I would rather die than continue, but in the horrible journey I came out alive. Wish you blessings in your journey. ❤ ❤ ❤
Thank you, Olga. Life is a journey and not all parts of it are enjoyable but overall it is a good experience if we remember this is just a small part of our travels.
My lifestyle is similar to yours in many ways, and I am very content with it, but I also struggle with accepting the physical limitations my body has. I remember too well how easy it used to be to do things and to accomplish a lot in one day. I understand that there are lessons to learn from this, and one of them is to be more understanding and compassionate toward others, the other lesson is to accept myself and my life as it is given to me, and not use minor problems as an excuse for grumbling or feeling sorry for myself. I am blessed, and I need to remind myself of that each day! 🙂
It does seem to take longer to get things done and many things don’t get done at all. But I think what doesn’t get done probably isn’t important anyway. One thing about getting older is that I have learned most of my troubles have been small and the few major ones have made me stronger and a better person. We are blessed beyond measure and we must remember to be thankful.
I think there is comfort in knowing that people I have met through blogging share the same difficulties, doubts, and joys. I just told CH yesterday that I was so angry at myself for being stuck in a habit that I have. Why are we so hard on ourselves? I have to tell myself that it is okay to be happy… 🙂 As I get older I think it is okay to not always be strong, to have some weaknesses and to allow myself that time. It sounds like you have found forgiveness for yourself… I think we deserve that.
I don’t know why we are hard on ourselves. Maybe we think we should be perfect and that really is foolish. I have learned that sometimes it is ok to wallow, wail, and waste time wandering down the roads of what if and if only for a time. Gets all the dirt out of my thinking and then I am ready to meet life head on again. it is ok to be happy! But would we appreciate it if we were never unhappy?
Self-acceptance is challenging at times but we get through it step by step. Understanding we are perfectly imperfect is key.
Life is a challenge and it is meant to be lived one day at a time. Understanding that perfection is a destination and we are on a journey toward it is important to our well-being.
I fully understand you – there are things which are too hard to accept and then I think that they are there for a reason. So usually I try to find this reason.
There is an unseen border between things we need to accept and things we can change. You never know on what side of the border you are but I think that as long as something inside you doesn’t let you accept it it means that you need to do something with it.
I agree we need to know where we are on the path. Not always easy to discern but worth the effort.
HUGS. I have lived with chronic illness that took years to figure out. I was 30 when it started, which was very unacceptable to peers. I got left behind as everyone was young and active. I declined as my illness did. It is systemic, affecting joints, organs, everything. I had to learn how to do things differently, rely on myself, accept myself, as well as other’s right to do what was right for them. I had to learn patience with them, and with myself. It was hard! I already knew “It is what it is”. Now, I had to accept, “I am who I am.” Now, with another birthday here, I know I am okay. I will be okay. Hugs, my friend. HUGS.
The hardest for me was the years of misdiagnosis. After 28 years I found a doctor that finally said it wasn’t all in my head and yes there was a problem and it was life changing. 21 years later, yes, still problems but I understand what is happening and can deal with it. Not to say there are not days and weeks that I am angry and sometimes depressed but it doesn’t steal my joy anymore. You are right…it is what it is…no point in feeling sorry for ourselves. Patience is a gift that we can give to others once we learn to give it to self.
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