“Never harbor grudges; they sour your stomach
and do no harm to anyone else.”
Robertson Davies
I agree that we shouldn’t hang onto grudges no matter how righteous we may think they are. Keeping track of grudges makes us unhappy and takes away from the simple pleasures of every day. Truly a waste of time. But I am not sure if harboring grudges doesn’t sometimes harm others.
Whatever wrongs or bad feelings we hold against another can hurt them. Maybe we were good friends. Maybe they need us in their life and we help them in some way whether we know it or not. If not good friends then maybe we were an acquaintance that simply filled a place in their life that was empty and only we fit in that space.
Even if we still interact with the one we are “grudging” against having that wall of chill between us can’t be good. Cold shoulders can lead to other aches and pains and ugliness and that can’t be good for the “grudgee” or the “grudger.” As adults do we really have time to waste on childish behavior?
If you are holding a grudge, if possible go talk to that person. It could all be just a misunderstanding. If not a misunderstanding and a true wrong that has been done perhaps it can be righted. Worth a try. If whatever the problem is cannot be resolved give it up and find forgiveness in your heart and part ways. Both of you will be better off.
Patricia's Place 
Excellent advice, Patricia. Life is too short to hold grudges. It’s worth a try to give it another go.
Life is short though when young we think it will never end. Is my age showing here?
We also think we’re invincible when we’re young, as well. Ha ha!
My feelings get hurt so easily, that I run away from people who say and do things without thinking. My isolation tendencies are so honed, that their absence due to that hurt, imagined or otherwise, feels natural to me. Toss in feeling invisible, I rarely think anyone notices I’m no longer there. Trust is in order in relationships and frankly, it’s a real problem area for me. I do apologize readily when I feel I’m in the wrong, but like all animals in the wild, I do run away to nurse my wounds. Lovely post Patricia, as always. Food for thought. Will examine those grudges I hold dear. 🙂
I hear you! Heart hurts are more painful than actual physical ones. We all suffer from these at times but it is important to not let them fester and become bitter. Don’t spend too much time pondering old grudges just don’t hold them close, my friend, let them fly away.
We try. We try. 🙂
You have very wise advice.
Thank you. I can write wise words but is much more difficult to live them and I often fail.
We all fail to live according to wise advice. Thank heavens God is perfect!
Amen!
Sometimes this works and sometimes it makes it worse. It’s still worth a try.
Have a fabulous day and week. ♥
It doesn’t always work but is worth the effort to try and make things right if only to know it’s the end of the relationship and there is closure.
All very right and good in theory. In practice, however we seldom are so wise and sensible. But one should always try.
That’s the key, try. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t and it’s time to say good-by.
Yes. True.
Very true and always worth a try Patricia, but sometimes the other party simply doesn’t want to know. 😦
Yes, there comes a time you just have to move on.