Posted in Friday, truth or tale..., whatever!

Friday, truth or tale…

 

victorian-home-1606836_640
Image by Keith Johnston from Pixabay

She said, “This isn’t working.” He said, What’s not working?” She said, “Us, our marriage.”

He said, “What are you saying?” She said, “I am tired of looking the other way and pretending all is well.” He said, “What? Looking the other way?” She said, “My ignoring your infidelity.” He said, “Infidelity? That’s crazy!” She said, “No it’s not. I know where you have been all those nights you were ‘working late’ or ‘out with the guys’.”

He said, “Yeah, I was working long late hours making a living so we could live the good life.” She said, “No, you were with other women.” He said, “No way! I love you I wouldn’t do that.” She said, “I have proof. I hired a Private Investigator and he gave me pictures with names and dates and places.”

He said, “Why would you do that? I thought you loved me.” She said, “I did love you but you betrayed my love and now there is no love and you have to leave.”  He said, “Leave?! I’m not leaving this is my house!”

She said, “No, it’s my house. I grew up here and my father left everything to me in a trust.” He said, “Yeah, well, we are married and what’s yours is mine!” She said, ” My father was a brilliant attorney and he took into account that there are men like you who marry women like me. Everything, all the properties, money, investments are mine and any children I may have but there are no provisions for a spouse or partner.”

He said, “You are crazy! Your father was crazy! Your whole family is crazy!” She said, “Maybe, but we are crazy, smart, and very rich. You are just crazy, not smart or rich. Now get out!”

He said, “No! I have investments in this place.” She said, “What investments?” He said, “The renovations and furnishings and artwork, all the stuff I brought.” She said, “Everything done or bought for this house was paid for by me. Not one penny of your money was spent. Everything that belongs to you, everything you brought with you to this house when we married is in a storage facility with the rent paid for thirty days. That should give you enough time to find somewhere to live. Perhaps, one of your women can help you out with that.”

He said, “I am not leaving and you can’t make me!” She said, “I thought you would not take this well and would be difficult so there is a Sheriff’s Deputy here to escort you from my home. Goodbye and best of luck, my dear.”

Posted in Reena's Exploration Challenge, whatever!

Confrontation…

Reena’s Exploration Challenge, Week 8
This week Reena challenges us to look at confrontation
and how we handle it, what we do to resolve it and how it affects us.
On her blog, she has posted an excerpt from a conversation with
psychotherapist Barry Michell about a tool
to use when facing confrontation.

funny-2759296_640

I am not a fan of confrontation and rarely initiate it but I do not run from it either. It helps if there is notice that there will be a difficult conversation so that emotions can be held in check and tempers don’t rule the meeting. Being blindsided by aggression is never easy. It takes patience and restraint under the best of circumstances to take the time to really listen to what is being said so that the problem is understood and can be resolved.

The paragraph below is from the conversation. There are two paragraphs before this one that set up the premise and it would help to read them for understanding. The link is here.

The first step of the tool is to scream silently to yourself, “Bring it on!” and move right into the cloud. Once you’re in it, you scream silently, “I love pain.” In this case “love” simply means I am one with this pain—I’m inside it. To get through something, you have to become one with it; then, and only then, can you let go of it. In the third and final step of the tool, the cloud spits you out; you find yourself soaring into a realm of pure light…and you say to yourself, “Pain sets me free.”

I can’t say I have used this approach. It seems counter-productive to me. I do think it is important to prepare yourself and accept that it may be unpleasant or painful and to acknowledge your feelings but I am not sure “pain sets you free.”  I have had my share of painful confrontation and I can’t say I have ever “become one with it” before I let it go.

We all see and work through problems in different ways. That’s what often brings on confrontations. Maybe if we spent less time centered on self and more on others the confrontations would be less confrontational and more conversational, less aggressive with more accomplished.

Ree3
Click here to see other explorations